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The Greatest Comeback Of All Time

   Inspired by recent goings on in Camp Nou, Barcelona's majestic football stadium, I've tasked myself with listing and ranking the greatest comebacks of all time. Where does Barcelona's stunning comeback over Paris St Germain a fortnight ago stand? Let's find out.

   Parameters are required, and I've decided to consider one comeback from each of the following fields: Football, Artists, Sayings, Clever Ideas and Shocking Movies, or FASCISM for short. Each entrant will be awarded a score out of 5, determining the greatest, and those I needn't have bothered mentioning.

   I've found the time to do this, following my own recent comeback to working life coming to an abrupt end after only 10 days.

Football

'Outrageous Celebrations' - Barcelona 6-1 Paris St Germain (Agg: 6-5) - 08/03/2017

   Trailing 4-0 from the 1st leg, Barcelona had to do what no team had done before, except Dunfermline Athletic weirdly, and turn around a 4-goal deficit to remain in European competition. Whilst Dunfermline beat Valencia 6-2 over half a century ago, to force a replay in The Inter-Cities Fairs Cup, Barca went one better in The UEFA Champions League, scoring 3 Neymar-inspired scorchers in the last 7 minutes, to win 6-1. 

   A comeback of epic proportions, inspiring kids the world over to kick a ball and grown men to make lists in blog format. 

Artists

'Starman' - David Bowie - 08/01/2013

   On his 66th birthday, the chameleon of rock sent shockwaves around the musical world, and further afield, by announcing the release of new material for the first time in 10 years. A single, Where Are We Now?, was accompanied two months later by an album, The Next Day. Fast forward 3 years, and the superstar completed his legendary comeback, this time on his 69th birthday, with the release of Blackstar, a whole 2 days before dying of liver cancer. 

   It's one thing to go out on top in a career spanning 6 decades, but will that see the boy from Brixton top our list?


Sayings

'Lazy Insults' - Your mum, Yer mum, Yo momma, Yo Mama - 1500 BC - Present Day

   Students have a lot to answer for. Whether it be destroying ceilings playing corridor cricket, as in my day, or creating a 3,500 year old joke, as in ancient Babylonian times. The joke in question, the incredibly annoying Your mum quip, is a comeback often used by people who literally can't think of anything else to say. Credit where credit's due though, as variations of Your mum are still used today, as demonstrated most recently by an irate David Haye. 

   In our list of comebacks, can Your mum jokes cum first? Just like your mum last night.

Clever Ideas

'Inspiring Articles' - Tommy 2.0 - 15/02/2017

   It goes without saying that I shouldn't include my own personal blogging comeback in a blogpost about the greatest comebacks of all time. The fact that I have, however, is partly down to the fact you're reading it, notching up pageviews and adding to my already inflated ego. Back in 2014, I was blogging at a rate of one post every 27.08 days. Compare that with 6.4 days so far in 2017, and with catchier headings, reduced swearing and topics including HIV, I feel it's justified. 

   Plus it's my blog, so I'll do whatever the sausage I want, as will become clear in the scoring below.

Shocking Movies

'Shocking Movies' - The Comebacks - 19/10/2007

   The movie The Comebacks (2007), starring David Koechner and Carl Weathers, is apparently shocking. Despite that fact I've never actually watched it, I have read a shockingly bad review. Had I have watched it, I can only imagine how sick it would have made me feel. So sick, I doubt I'd have been able to write this post. Luckily, as I say, I haven't watch it, which I think we can all agree is a good thing.

  Catwoman (2004), Batman & Robin (1997) and Bat Pussy (unknown, possibly 1973) are also shocking apparently. They're predominantly about bats and cats though, not comebacks.

The Results

   After much deliberation, I have decided to award points thusly:

  • Football - 'Outrageous Celebrations' - 4/5
  • Artists - 'Starman' - 5/5
  • Sayings - 'Lazy Insults' - 2/5
  • Clever Ideas - 'Inspiring Articles' - 3/5
  • Shocking Movies - 'Shocking Movies' - 1/5

   Leaving us with an order of Starman, Outrageous Celebrations, Inspired Articles, Lazy Insults and Shocking Movies, or SOCIALISM for short. Congratulations to the late David Bowie, and I'll be having a word with myself later about only placing my blog 3rd. After I've watched Bat Pussy that is.

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