In this post, I'll be discussing a unique and inspired sitcom idea that I had with my good friend, and South America travel companion, James.
Following the demise of the Madchester scene, Chris Turley and Tony Digest, perennial party people, attempt to go cold turkey. Tony vigorously sticks to his abstinence, terrified of the repercussions of Mary, his girlfriend. Chris, however, struggles and it's not long until he's bouncing off the walls again in The Haçienda.
With clarity restored (and coinciding with the much-anticipated release of The Stone Roses Second Coming album), Tony begins to notice strange and mysterious similarities between Chris's life and that of the late Jesus Christ.
He bears witness to Chris going berserk at a car boot sale (John 2:14 - Jesus gets angry at the market and upturns some tables), him inadvertently exposing a "blind" benefit fraudster (John 9:1-12 - Jesus Heals a Man Born Blind) and spends 40 days and 40 nights worrying after Chris goes AWOL after attending Wilderness Festival (Matthew 4:1-11 - Jesus Is Tested in the Wilderness).
Is this strange run of events all a huge coincidence? Does the title of his favourite bands upcoming album have a deeper relevance? Will anyone believe the former wreck-head's divine observations?
Mary, sensing an opportunity to make a quick buck, sets about persuading Tony to go to the local rag with his amazing revelations. Despite protesting "the press will crucify him", Tony puts in a call. Unfortunately this plan backfires, as The Manchester Evening News bring his delusional story to the attention of the local mental health service.
He's subsequently sectioned under the Mental Health Act, 1983, and detained in an old rundown mental hospital on the outskirts of Salford.
Thankfully all is not lost, as the pair's dealer, Richard Gear, the real star of the show, will almost certainly be used in an offshoot, following his adventures marauding the streets of Manchester, dealing drugs (including, amongst others, his very own Cocaine and Heroin mix 'An Officer And A Gentleman', an extra strong dosage of Rohypnol 'Pretty Woman', and a suppository called 'the Gerbil').
The idea was conceived in the midst of a hellish 43 hour bus ride between Ecuador and Peru. Could we, two middle class fuddy-duddies, born and raised on separate sides of the Watford Gap, compose a piece about the second coming of Christ? Of course we could...
The Plot
Manchester, 1994*
Following the demise of the Madchester scene, Chris Turley and Tony Digest, perennial party people, attempt to go cold turkey. Tony vigorously sticks to his abstinence, terrified of the repercussions of Mary, his girlfriend. Chris, however, struggles and it's not long until he's bouncing off the walls again in The Haçienda.
With clarity restored (and coinciding with the much-anticipated release of The Stone Roses Second Coming album), Tony begins to notice strange and mysterious similarities between Chris's life and that of the late Jesus Christ.
He bears witness to Chris going berserk at a car boot sale (John 2:14 - Jesus gets angry at the market and upturns some tables), him inadvertently exposing a "blind" benefit fraudster (John 9:1-12 - Jesus Heals a Man Born Blind) and spends 40 days and 40 nights worrying after Chris goes AWOL after attending Wilderness Festival (Matthew 4:1-11 - Jesus Is Tested in the Wilderness).
Is this strange run of events all a huge coincidence? Does the title of his favourite bands upcoming album have a deeper relevance? Will anyone believe the former wreck-head's divine observations?
Mary, sensing an opportunity to make a quick buck, sets about persuading Tony to go to the local rag with his amazing revelations. Despite protesting "the press will crucify him", Tony puts in a call. Unfortunately this plan backfires, as The Manchester Evening News bring his delusional story to the attention of the local mental health service.
He's subsequently sectioned under the Mental Health Act, 1983, and detained in an old rundown mental hospital on the outskirts of Salford.
Many months later an unkempt Chris, adorned in tatty robes and sandals acquired from a nearby skip, pays Tony a surprise visit. They sit facing each other on plastic chairs in a padded room. Suddenly Tony's mouth drops open, as his eye catches the security pass hanging from Chris's neck... which reads in big, bold capital letter 'CHRIS.T'
The audience are left mildly amused. 'What in heaven's name have we just watched?'
Conclusion
Safe in the knowledge we'd struck gold, we googled Second Coming, just on the extreme off chance anything like this had been conceived of before.
OH COME ON!!! The Second Coming? Christopher Eccelston? Russel T. Davies? ITV? Manchester? 2003? What the...? Could we change the name to Coming Second and hope no one notices? Of course not, you get nothing for coming second.
OH COME ON!!! The Second Coming? Christopher Eccelston? Russel T. Davies? ITV? Manchester? 2003? What the...? Could we change the name to Coming Second and hope no one notices? Of course not, you get nothing for coming second.
Thankfully all is not lost, as the pair's dealer, Richard Gear, the real star of the show, will almost certainly be used in an offshoot, following his adventures marauding the streets of Manchester, dealing drugs (including, amongst others, his very own Cocaine and Heroin mix 'An Officer And A Gentleman', an extra strong dosage of Rohypnol 'Pretty Woman', and a suppository called 'the Gerbil').
Yesterday I asked my co-dreamweaver James for a quote to accompany my article, to which he enthusiastically replied, 'It's your life mate, just don't use that picture of me'.
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*Whilst many a "claimant" predicted the second coming of Christ would be in the year 2000, some "scholars" maintain that he could have been born as early as 6BC. Hence, 1994.
Someone was listening in History class.
<< As If I'd Never Been Away / Football 'Pitches' >>
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*Whilst many a "claimant" predicted the second coming of Christ would be in the year 2000, some "scholars" maintain that he could have been born as early as 6BC. Hence, 1994.
Someone was listening in History class.
<< As If I'd Never Been Away / Football 'Pitches' >>
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